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Dear FreeSpiritedMind,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but dislike your eyelashes. I think I realized it that night you picked your nose at the mental hospital and I saw you sit on the Catholic priest. I'm sure you're high enough to understand how awful you are. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep your glass eye as a memory. You should also know that I also get sick when I think of your feet and you should stop picking your nose.
Love always,
Mordecai
PS: Writing this ate my soul
---
How to do this:
Dear (Choose a random person.),
I don't really know how to tell you this, but (1). I think I realized it when (2) (3) and I saw you (4) (5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11).
(12),
(Your name)
1) What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red - Our affair is over
White - The rainbow hedgehogs want to destroy you
Black -Our romance is over
Green- Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - I'm joining the Convent
Other -I dislike your eyelashes
2) Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forrest Gump
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on Nutella
May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
June - When you put cuffs on me
July – When I saw the purple monkey
August - When you smacked my ass
September - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
October -Last year when you peed your pants
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I finally changed my underwear
3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Chicken- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad – In your apartment
Lasagna - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Chrétien
Seafood - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper
4) What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bit of
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over
5) What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey – The Catholic Priest
Brown – The Montreal Canadiens' goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red – My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 CD
Pink – Your "My Little Pony" collection
Other - The elephant in the corner
6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat -shamed
House- Sterile
7) Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by my the garbage man
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we're related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Silly - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist
Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other - That your driving sucks
8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Our matching snoopy underwear
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Your toe ring
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your collection of butterflies
C/D - Your photo with the moustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbors dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your virginity
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X – Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards
10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Get sick when I think of your feet
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H – Will not tell the authorities that you stole the whale from the backyard.
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Hate your cooking
M/N - Love your sweet, sweet ass
O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
Q/R - Always wanted to break your legs
S/T -Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Haven't showered in a month
Y/Z – am better off without you
11) What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I love Oprah
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war.
Snapple/Vitamin water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked out
Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Whiskey - I'm off to lead a new life as a lemon
Beer – Thanks for the Cocaine
Other – you should stop picking your nose
12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand – Warm tingly sensations
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don't hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Best of luck on the sex change
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself
I don't really know how to tell you this, but dislike your eyelashes. I think I realized it that night you picked your nose at the mental hospital and I saw you sit on the Catholic priest. I'm sure you're high enough to understand how awful you are. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep your glass eye as a memory. You should also know that I also get sick when I think of your feet and you should stop picking your nose.
Love always,
Mordecai
PS: Writing this ate my soul
---
How to do this:
Dear (Choose a random person.),
I don't really know how to tell you this, but (1). I think I realized it when (2) (3) and I saw you (4) (5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11).
(12),
(Your name)
1) What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red - Our affair is over
White - The rainbow hedgehogs want to destroy you
Black -Our romance is over
Green- Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - I'm joining the Convent
Other -I dislike your eyelashes
2) Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forrest Gump
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on Nutella
May - When I threw up in your sock drawer
June - When you put cuffs on me
July – When I saw the purple monkey
August - When you smacked my ass
September - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
October -Last year when you peed your pants
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I finally changed my underwear
3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Chicken- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad – In your apartment
Lasagna - In your closet
Kebab - With Jean Chrétien
Seafood - In a clown suit
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the mental hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper
4) What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bit of
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over
5) What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey – The Catholic Priest
Brown – The Montreal Canadiens' goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red – My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 CD
Pink – Your "My Little Pony" collection
Other - The elephant in the corner
6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat -shamed
House- Sterile
7) Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by my the garbage man
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we're related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Silly - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist
Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other - That your driving sucks
8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
White - Our matching snoopy underwear
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
Grey - Your toe ring
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your collection of butterflies
C/D - Your photo with the moustache drawn on it
E/F - Your neighbors dog
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your virginity
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X – Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards
10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Get sick when I think of your feet
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H – Will not tell the authorities that you stole the whale from the backyard.
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Hate your cooking
M/N - Love your sweet, sweet ass
O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
Q/R - Always wanted to break your legs
S/T -Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Haven't showered in a month
Y/Z – am better off without you
11) What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I love Oprah
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war.
Snapple/Vitamin water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked out
Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Whiskey - I'm off to lead a new life as a lemon
Beer – Thanks for the Cocaine
Other – you should stop picking your nose
12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand – Warm tingly sensations
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don't hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Best of luck on the sex change
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England - Go drown yourself
1000 Hands
1000 Hands
So this is it. I am here at last at this humble hill of self imposed drawing madness, and I'm so damn proud that I could reach this.
I'm always trying to improve in art in general, I always am trying to get better at everything and anything, but I've gotten a bit fatalistic about the whole process. I keep on feeling that there is no true way to learn anything new, that there's really only the stuff you pick up over time and there's no way you can consciously advance a step forward in a direction you want to go. Things just sort of sort themselves out and there's no point in stressing yourself over it, or bothering about it. The b
10,000 Stick Figures
I drew 10,000 stick figures.
It took me 45 days, but goodness, I finally hit the milestone, and it's quite appropriate that there is no appropriate in how sudden and unexplosive it was to cross the finish line. Almost poetic.
Suffering yet another drought of art, where I had no will to learn or to draw anything really - Especially when it came to my comic projects - and where I felt no drive to even write, I was once again in that endless spiral of despair of having distinct wishes to be able to draw like so and so - to at least have some sort of finished project, to be a master of a certain fundamental. I have the ebooks, I have the youtub
01.02.2017
Greetings, Journal, it has been a while.
Guh, so much to talk about, so little time and space.
Let me just say: Epiphanies are great! While they come, in their rare moments.
I have a sudden craving for Sushi.
Let's get to the arting thing, eh?
27.11.2016 - The Journey Continues
The day keeps on turning, the seasons keep on turning, and it has been too long since I just felt great about the whole art process in general, and I doubt I'll feel it again, but I'll sure as hell keep at it.
I miss making art for the smallest reasons, I miss making it for the biggest reasons. I miss being inspired by the drawings and paintings I see from all across the board, no matter how many people like them or not. I miss that optimistic fool.
I'll never be that person again, but I sure as hell will try to reach out more, to draw more, to train more. To get back into the process.
Long story short, the process continues.
© 2015 - 2024 legomaestro
Comments8
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But I need my glass eye to view mature content..!!1!
geev it baaaccckkkk
//dying
grey huh~?
geev it baaaccckkkk
//dying
grey huh~?